next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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