I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
