I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Need sex. Gaining weight.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
