I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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