ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Non-Jews are for practice
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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