She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
