I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
