Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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