Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
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