Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
