Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
