oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
