apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Randomize
