epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Randomize
