i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
