hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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