He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
