it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Randomize