from now on my penis is your penis
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
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