I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize
