Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Randomize
