Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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