I'd wear matching sweaters with you
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
You dont lie about slip and slides
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
