its not stalking. its research.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
