haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Randomize
