Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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