just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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