The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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