I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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