the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Dear god my vagina.
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