Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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