I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
