Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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