I must be too annoying 4 u.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
