Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
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