He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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