No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize
