We're like a lot better than the average bears
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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