I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I woke up under a house in Key West
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