Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
You have to summon your inner elephant
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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