Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
