when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Text me some of your sweat
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
