I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Every concussion has its silver lining
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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