idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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