and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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