You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Randomize
