The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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