she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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