Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
