Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
