Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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