Do you still have your period?
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Randomize
